Moving outside your comfort zone is uncomfortable

This is my experience. Whenever I decide to take another stretch, I encounter discomfort. Make sense of course but this insight has taken on a deeper meaning on me recently.

When we’ve taken a lesson, grown from an experience or made our stretch zone comfort zone again, we think we’ve made it. At least in this area. Thing is, whenever we change the context, the same lesson might very well present itself again. Same confusion, just on a higher level.

Here’s a recent example from my own life. I thought I had learnt enough about dealing with emotions, facing my fears and accepting myself, to be able to function through any transition. I’m not judging myself for this, but, still, there is no there there. I knew that. Still, I got really surprised by my reaction to the transition that I’m currently in. Moving from security, big corporation, longterm plans and a job description. From being a small piece in a big machine, to building my own machine altogether. I didn’t expect it to be so overwhelming. I thought I had it all figured out.

We never do. Not fully. Maybe in this specific context or in a very specific area. But if we’ve chosen a path of expansion, if we choose to keep growing, the same lesson might very well come back around again and again.

Don’t be discouraged. Look at it as a spiral, not a loop. You’re moving up the spiral, same confusion but on a higher level, always expanding and growing. Don’t give up. You’re doing a great job! I won’t give up. I’m doing a great job!

With all my love,

Helena

Perfect is not normal

Sometimes we act as if our messy life is something out of the ordinary. As if everyone else has it all figured out. That’s not reality. Messy is normal.

Having this human experience includes feeling confused, frustrated and lost. We don’t have to stay there forever, but we will always get back to it, over and over and over again. As with meditation, the practice is not to never lose your footing, the practice is to get back up, again and again. And if you ever think that any of your emotions are unique to you, don’t worry, you didn’t invent them, they are all universal and as part of the human family we all experience them in one way or another.

So, you’re off the hook. Stop striving for perfect. Accept the mess. Accept yourself.

With all my love,
Helena

We meet others on the same depth at which we’ve met ourselves

You can’t fully meet and understand another until you’ve fully met and understood yourself. You know when you talk to some people it feels as if they just get you, they understand the you beyond the words and stories. With others you can use however many explanations and metaphors but they still don’t at all understand who you are and you always feel misunderstood.

I believe the difference here are people that have gone towards the depths of themselves or not. If you’ve never dared to dig a little deeper, you will never go deep with anyone else. Do the work. And, as if understanding yourself wasn’t reward enough, you will have the benefit of understanding others better as well.

With all my love,

Helena