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Re-programming the mind

The only way to remove a thought is to replace it with another one. Have you thought about this?

The mind doesn’t recognize your negatives so it’s likely your attempts at clarifying to yourself ”I will never do this again!” is understood as ”I will do this again!” and you end up in the same old patterns. The trick is to forget what you don’t want anymore and instead focus on what you do want.

Affirm what you want and crowd out what you don’t. Focus on the positives.

I will be clear with my boundaries!

I will ask for help!

I will go outside of my comfort zone!

I will be more of me!

What do you desire?


With all my love,



Would you be okay to die today?

This might be a provocative question to you but I think it’s a good one to reflect on. Measuring not on what you’ve done but who you’ve been.

Have you seen? Have you experienced? Have you given? Have you lived?

I really don’t want to die yet or for a long time to come, and I know that I have a lot to do here still, for many, many years to come. But just thinking about it today I wouldn’t have any regrets. I would know that I lived, that I tried, that I dared and that I gave – to the best of my ability at any given time.

It doesn’t mean that everyday is rewarding or productive or even meaningful, right then. It just means that I choose life, over and over again. I choose to expand. I choose to experience. I choose to share and give and participate. Sure, I have areas where I hold back and where I’m not brave enough, but I’m consciously working on that to get closer.

It’s not about what you do or what you have, it’s who you be. Are you living in your potential?

With all my love,


Needing each other is the best part of life

I heard Glennon Doyle Melton say this not long ago, and the words stayed with me.

Relationships are the most beautiful thing in life. Yes. They are also, a lot of the time, the most difficult thing we all deal with. Difficult because we make them so immensely important to us and they require so much; communication, energy, time.

The closer they are, the more rewarding, the more challenging. Often. Does it have to be this way? Is it true? Can we make them easier, more effortless or fluid? I don’t know. I’m certainly no expert.

I do think, however, that vulnerability, openness and asking for what we want and need are important cornerstones to any relationship that give more than it takes. Those are the kinds of relationships that I need so that what I need to do.

With all my love,


How can I get my needs met?

If you feel down in any way – ask yourself this: What needs are not being met right now? Then, find a way to get those needs met without the expectation on anyone else to change.

If you’re in a relationship where you don’t feel valued and you get constantly annoyed – maybe you need to find a way to set boundaries, ask for what you want or leave? If you’re overworking and don’t feel appreciated and get sad about this – maybe you need to validate yourself first, find ways to feel this feeling elsewhere or give some constructive feedback to your boss or colleagues? If you’re not getting a creative outlet in your life and you feel frustrated – maybe you need to prioritize your time and make time for a new hobby, or look for some mentors to help inspire you.

It’s all in your hands you know and that’s not so bad, it means you can change whatever needs changing yourself.

With all my love,


Please believe in me!

It’s part of the human experience to sometimes doubt. If I could, I would just tell you to stop doing it, it’s not constructive. But, still, we do it.

So when you can’t find the reasons to believe in yourself, ask someone else to do it for you. Ask for help. It’s okay to have a down-days when everything feels in vain or as if you’re moving in circles. If you’ve created a great support around you, ask your supporters to hold the belief for you. Just for a while, until you’re done with being low. And ask them to remind you sometimes, of how amazing you really are and all the great things you are capable of, just because you are you.

I think you’re amazing! I know you are capable of great things! I know you’re worthy just because you are you!

With all my love,


© Copyright - Helena Önneby